Hello there, thanks for stopping by today!

Fortunately, this website has only been tested on desktop browsers. We do not hope to expand our services to mobile users, and we don't guarantee a bug-free experience. Some features on our website might not have been designed not to work properly on a mobile device. For the best user experience, we recommend using a desktop computer.

Sorry? You should be. Seriously, it's 2017. Go use a computer.

And one more thing, mobile devices are carcinogenic. So get the heck away from them. Before you die.

No, but seriously, learn how to protect yourself.

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